11 tips for Successful Missionaries

11 can't-miss tips for successful LDS missionaries

            17 Comments »

By Jason F. Wright, For the Deseret News

Published: Tuesday, Aug. 13 2013 11:08 a.m. MDT

Nearly a year has passed since President Thomas S. Monson of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints announced the historic change to the church’s missionary program. It’s become known colloquially as the “age change” — meaning that worthy young men are eligible to serve at the age of 18 instead of 19 and after graduating from high school. Young women are now invited to serve at 19 instead of 21.

This change has produced a remarkable surge in missionaries entering the field. The LDS Church estimates there will be about 80,000 missionaries serving by October. Before the announcement, there were about 54,000 missionaries.

This wave of willingness to tune out the world and serve the Lord as his full-time representative is inspiring. Witnessing these young men and women flood the field reminds me of my own mission to Brazil many years ago. My time there remains among my most treasured experiences and chief accomplishments. If I could return today, I would.

While serving as a young man — and later teaching for a short time at the Mission Training Center in Provo, and even now having Mormon missionaries into my home as often as possible and working with them at every opportunity — I’ve learned a few things about the differences between happy, successful missionaries and the unpleasant alternatives.

I call them my 11 can’t-miss tips for successful missionaries.

Be obedient — period

1. Be obedient — period. Following mission rules brings blessings you cannot fathom until you are immersed in obedience. Learn the rules and follow them.

Don't judge

2. Don’t judge. At times, you will feel tempted to judge other missionaries and their efforts. Remember, your skills and natural abilities may be different than those you serve with. Their best effort doesn’t need to be good enough for you; it needs to be good enough for the Lord.

Be obedient every minute of every day

3. Be obedient every minute of every day. You are unlikely to meet returned missionaries who were obedient but still regret their missions. But you will certainly encounter others who were never consistently obedient and never found the promised success and happiness. Being obedient doesn't mean you won't have difficult days, but it does mean more much success and happiness than otherwise.

Serve your companions

4. Serve your companions. Iron their shirts, make their beds and shine their shoes. If you’re blessed to be assigned a more challenging personality or someone who’s struggling, serve them even more.

Be obedient — even in the small things

5. Be obedient — even in the small things. Obedience is the only frequency that the Spirit operates in. Be sure you’re dialed in every time you walk out your front door to share the gospel.

Give praise

6. Give praise. Tell your companions, especially the challenging ones, that you think they're great missionaries and, eventually, they will be. At some point you will inevitably be assigned the companion with the “reputation.” Let them know you’ve only heard terrific things about them and offer a clean slate. When your mission is complete, be the one who says every single companion he had was amazing.

Be obedient

7. Be obedient. You will make mistakes and grow better each day at effectively teaching the gospel. But while you can't be perfect in all things, you can be perfectly obedient.

Love

8. Love. Love those you teach with all your heart, even the ones who ultimately reject the message. You will plant seeds that may not be harvested for months or years by others who will come after. But you'll harvest some that were planted by missionaries now home, married and gray.

Exercise faith

9. Exercise faith that obedience leads to greater success. If you have faith in this principle, you will see it unfold in miraculous ways.

Love each and every day

10. Love each and every day. Young missionaries only get this opportunity to serve 24/7. Leave nothing behind and don't regret a single day.

Be yourself

11. Be yourself! Smile! Laugh! Have fun! Sometimes elders and sisters think that obedience and the black name tag means you’re required to shelf your personality and become ultra serious. The Lord doesn’t want us to be different people — he wants us to be better versions of ourselves.

My First Drill

I came across this paper I wrote about 5 years ago.  I don't know if I ever posted it - I don't believe so.  I wish I was better at journallng, but would like my children and grandchildren to know a little about me and my life, so I'm inserting it here, to be recorded as part of my journal.  One of these days I'll catch up on posts as well.  It has been a busy year for me working full-time as a long-term 4th grade teacher; which looks like it will continue through the end of the school year.Trevor is doing well on his mission and his language seems to be coming right along after 4 months.  Spencer is getting closer and closer to graduation in June and Ken and I are closer to becoming empty nesters - not sure if I'm happy or sad about that  (a little of both).  Mostly it will just be a new adventure and adjustment in our life that we will weather together.

MY FIRST DRILL

I grew up in a country home.  Even though my dad was considered a blue-collar worker, we lived in a farming community.  My dad was the Agricultural teacher at the high school.  He taught young men how to fix cars, how to build houses, how to grow vegetables, and how to raise and slaughter animals for food.  After work we would feed the horse and pigs in our backyard.  Sometimes we went to the fields my dad tended.  My siblings and I experienced lots of different things in our small, religious farming community of 300 people.  It seemed to me my dad could do anything.  He was a gruff but loving man.  He was a big man, but he was fast.  My brothers learned real quick that big did not mean slow.  My dad taught us to race. The annual 4^th of July races were one of the highlights of the year.  We practiced and trained for those races.  We were proud to be recipients of the 1^st place "quarter" year after year.  We enjoyed a carefree childhood of roaming the streets, swimming in “The Falls”, playing hide-n-seek with the neighborhood kids, and of course learning how to work.

            When I was eight years old life drastically changed.  My dad decided it was time to get his Doctorate of Education.  He packed up our family and moved us across country from Nevada to Ohio.  Life was different in the city.  We had to get use to lots of new things.  The closest church was 30 minutes away.  My siblings and I were the only members of our religion in our school.  We were exposed to a different world.  It was difficult being away from friends and family, but we persevered.  My dad was still a country boy.  One day he brought home a bunch of chickens to be killed, plucked and cleaned.  It was quite a sight all those chickens running around with their heads cut off and my little brothers chasing after them.  We made new friends and life went on.  Soon two years was up and my dad graduated.  It was time to move back west.  Hooray - aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents – time to go home. 

We went back to our little country town, but that only lasted a few weeks.  My dad found a job in the city.  We bought a house and moved.  When we registered for school we learned I would be bussed across town.  Our city was beginning a new integration program.  The black kids would be bussed across to the mostly white side of town for 1^st through 5^th grade and the white kids would be bussed to special 6^th grade centers on the west side of town.  Gone were the carefree days of my younger years.  Although I had friends of all colors I now knew about racism, a new concept for me.

            Life continued to change in the city; more people, more opportunities.  High school brought challenges and a few successes.  My dad was still my hero.  I remember for one youth activity he cooked a whole pig with eyeballs and all.  It seemed all the kids liked my dad.  My friends and I would wait on the outskirts of gatherings so that when it was time to divide into cars we could be the first to my dad’s car.

            I remember one day when I was in high school and was a little rebellious, my dad pulled me aside and with tears in his eyes he told me he was worried that my mom would have a nervous breakdown and asked me to be more kind and patient with her.  My parents never fought.  They were not very affectionate in front of us, but we knew they loved each other a great deal.

            I learned many things from my dad about love, service and hard work.  My dad was hardly ever sick.  He hardly ever sat and watched television.  He was a do-er.  Occasionally my mom would tell me you’re just like your dad.  I thought this was a great compliment.

            My first few months away at college were difficult.  I was dealing with a lot of personal stuff, finding out college was harder than I expected, and a little homesickness as well.  One week the end of October my mom called to say my dad was sick and they took him to the hospital.  Over the next few days he continued to get worse and they put him in intensive care.  The doctors could not figure out what was wrong.  Miraculously he started to improve and they thought he would be home by the end of the week.  I knew someone going home that weekend so I decided to go home to help out with my younger brothers while my mom was at the hospital.  I saw my dad on Saturday and he looked good.  Sunday morning before church I stopped by to see him.  He didn’t look well and he was having a difficult time.  As I left he called out to me, “I love you, Vera”.  This was very unusual for him to say.  It meant a lot to me.  I went home and took my younger brothers to church, then went home and made dinner.  As we sat down to eat I heard my brother come in and I turned around, saw his face, and I knew.  MY DAD WAS GONE!

            Life was different without my dad.  There were many difficult days the first few years.  We all learned to go on and we drew closer together as a family.

            Soon I married a great man, but he was a city boy – not the country boy I was use to.  I tried to instill in him a desire to be a fix-it man like my dad, but it just didn’t work.  One day I said to a friend I wish my husband would let me buy him tools, but he just doesn’t want them.  A few months later on my birthday I opened a beautiful gift to find – my drill!  I realized that I was the one who wanted tools, why couldn’t I learn to use them, so I did.  I now have several kinds of saws, a router, many other tools, and of course my first drill.  I don’t think my friend realized that the gift she was giving me would mean so much, but I love tools.  It let me know that I can do whatever I want to do and in some small ways it helps me to know that I’m still daddy’s girl.

Busy Summer

Where do you begin when life has passed you by.  So much has happened.  The end of May Trevor graduated and received the Melchizedek Priesthood.  We had lots of family and a wonderful time.

Then in June Ken and I and Trevor and Spencer went with the Briggs and Katie and Alex to California and had a wonderful time at Disneyland and Knottsberry Farm. Last Hurrah before Trevor left home.

The next day Trevor and I took off for BYU for a summer term - and this time I went and stayed.  The first night Trevor and I took in a BYU soccer game, after that he made friends and had a wonderful term ending with straight A's.  He loved BYU!   I spent the weekdays with Katie and Alex and attending classes and then drove home each weekend.  Everyone said I enjoyed school too much.  Is that possible?  I loved the classes I took and the interaction with teachers and students.  It was a nice break from my Independent Study Program where everything is done on my own.  I managed to pull out 2 A-'s and 1 A.  It was a lot of work, but very rewarding.  I hope to find a way to do a summer term again in the future.

The first part of August we took Trevor to the temple for the first time.  We went to the Draper, Utah temple.  He felt really good about it and has already returned quite a few times. 

As soon as school ended Melanie and I took off for Oregon to exchange cars with April and James.  They had borrowed our Suburban to move and we went to retrieve it.  We stopped by Nancy's first and then down to Bend, Or where James and April moved for him to teach Chinese at the Community College (it sounds like she might be able to teach some Math classes as well).  We had an enjoyable trip.

After returning home, the following week was Trevor's farewell.  We took no group pictures even though we had all the family here except James and April.  Even grandparents were all here.  The weather cooperated and we enjoyed everyone being here to say goodbye.  Then a week later we were off to the MTC for a quick goodbye and a new journey beginning.

So there you have the last several months in a nut shell.  We hope life will be a little slower this upcoming year, but we do have another senior to graduate.

Spring brings 2 new babies

Baby #1
Dylan Lamar Pay was born on February 16th - 1 month early and he ended up spending about 3 weeks in the hospital before he was strong enough to come home.  Melanie has her hands full with 4 young children and I enjoyed spending two weeks caring for 3 of them.  Bryton became my buddy and Aaryn decided I was tolerable.  Jayden, well he is growing so fast and thinks he knows alot.  One day I was going to give him a ride to school, but didn't want to dress for the day until I took a shower, so I was going to do what I often do - drive him to school with my robe on.  (Nick saved the day and decided to drop him off.)  I went to pick him up at noon and overheard him telling his teacher - "My grandma was going to drive me to school this morning in her towel."  I was horrified - she said don't worry I don't believe most of what kindergarteners say.  Apparently his mom never wears a robe.

5 lb 3 oz   17.25 inches

Mommy and baby - Gives you an idea of how tiny he was.

Jayden reading us a book online.

Baby #2
Wesley Russell Barrus was born on April 9th.  He weighed in at a meager 6 lb 11 oz and 19 1/2 inches long.  Chelsea was grateful for a smaller baby and a fairly easy delivery.  The Barrus' journeyed to Denver the first week and I had to wait until I wrapped up some things at home, so Wesley was 2 weeks old when I got to hold him and love on him.  He is a good baby who enjoys sleeping (Gavin is still struggling to figure that part out).  I spent lots of time with Gavin - he preferred we spend all the time ("in my room" with the door closed).  Gavin really loves the Avenger characters as well as Green Lantern.  He has many of the toys and even an avenger mask.  He talks really well and is alot of fun to be with.  We had a great time playing, shopping, and taking care of baby Wesley. 

Found a hat to match his shirt while we were at Walmart

Taking picture with Hulk

Playing with Grandma's phone - Gavin wanted to play all the time.

I have fallen Facebook Victim.  It's so easy to check in on what's going on with others and I have not been following the Blog world very well or keeping up with my own posts (which are my journal - by the way.  So it's time to play a little catch up.  Journaling twice a year is not the best way to go.

SENIOR NEWS

Trevor is a Senior and his life is changing quickly, so here's an update.  He has had a busy year playing Soccer, Basketball, and Track!  Track of course is his love as he aspires to be State Champ in not just one event, but several this year.  The team has struggled with a strange schedule, bad weather, and personal frustrations.  The weather this year has been very off season, so we were really hoping for great weather for division - and that is what we got.  A scorching 96 degrees, but no wind.  Trevor's biggest competition attends The Meadows High School in Las Vegas and unfortunately our schedule did not allow them to race before divisions, but their times were very close going in.
In both the 300 hurdles and the 110 hurdles Trevor led until the last hurdle where The Meadows guy was able to over take him and win by a foot or two.  So it's anybody's win at State!  The best part is his time was great and he was pushed to his very best.

White Pine Boys Track & Field 1st Place Division Champs

April took some pictures for us for his Senior announcements and graduation is just around the corner.

We have also been working on his missionary papers and they should be in this week sometime, so we should have his call by the end of the month.  Trevor has decided to go to BYU for the summer term and will leave 2 weeks after school gets out, so his life is changing quickly.  Graduation - College - then Mission all in the next few months!

Trevor has worked very hard in school and ended up 5th in his class.  He applied for lots of scholarships and received a total of 8 scholarships for $7000 - that is fabulous and will really help him get started. One of the scholarships Trevor received was Elks Most Valuable Student for White Pine and received a $1000 scholarship and was sent on to the State Level.  He won another $1000 scholarship at the State Level.  This is the essay he wrote that allowed him to win these two scholarships.

My future has been changed by the fact that I am a part of the Boy Scouts of America.  Scouting gives opportunities to learn all different sorts of skills.  As a young scout I learned how to be a follower in listening to the leader.  Later I learned to be the leader as I served in leadership positions such as senior patrol leader.  On top of leadership, scouting helped me develop skills in other fields of study such as citizenship, physical health, and financial planning.  All of these skills are used in the adult world and I will be better prepared to perform my civic duties, keep myself healthy, and maintain a budget to support my family because of the activities I participated in during scouting.
            Scouting has helped me gain confidence.  I have always been a shy person.  No matter how hard I try I have problems talking or asking questions.  Being shy can be crippling in situations such as finding a job.  Scouting helped me to overcome my shyness through my eagle project.  The responsibility to plan, organize, and see that the project was carried out became mine and I had to step up.  First, I needed to talk to the city manager about fixing up a city park.  This involved talking to someone I had never met and explaining an entire project that I had envisioned.  Together we were able to come up with a project that would benefit the community and I could oversee.  My second task was to get all of the required materials and manpower at the park.  This required phone calls and preparation which took me out of my comfort zone.  Lastly, I had to oversee the project and assign people tasks.  I was able to work on every aspect of the project but I also delegated different sections of the project such as cleaning, building, or cement mixing to others.  Even though these tasks were out of my comfort zone I was able to enjoy my project and learn to be a better leader.  Now I find it much less difficult to meet new people, share my ideas, plan ahead, and even take charge when necessary. 

            Being an eagle scout will affect me the rest of my life in a positive way.  An eagle scout is nationally recognized by businesses, schools, and even the government.  However, the main focus of scouting is service.  I have learned the value of serving others and know that it will help me in my home and my community. Understanding the value of hard work will help me be a better husband, father, and employee.  Lastly I have learned the value of being a better and kinder citizen.  Scouting has truly impacted my life, and armed with the skills I learned as a member of the Boy Scouts of America, I will have a brighter future.

The almost made it to the Christmas Letter Update

Well what about everyone else these last 5 months? April and James decided to stay in Ely for awhile and have found their own apartment (and a lot of work went with fixing it up). James is still looking for a permanent job and meanwhile they are subbing at the local schools. Everett is growing like crazy and is very inquisitive as most Toddlers are. We are enjoying having them close by.

Selina's job is going well. She is enjoying teaching middle school math in Arizona.  Bobby’s work has been a challenge as he works very long hours for low pay.  He decided to try his hand at a new job in Wyoming.  If it works out Selina and the kids will head there later.  Richie is doing great in kindergarten and learning very quickly.  Kamry keeps everyone in line as all little girls should.

Melanie and Nick are doing well and expecting their 4^th addition, another little boy in March.  The kids are really getting big.  Jayden is doing pretty well in Kindergarten, but wishes he could do what he wants all day and not necessarily what the teacher wants him to do.  He is very smart and can already read books only a few months into kindergarten.  Aaryn is making great strides with school and his physical therapist.  He is mellowing out some and has his own way of letting you know what he likes and doesn’t like.  His communication skills are really getting better all the time.  Bryton usually has a big smile and he has no trouble keeping up with his big brothers.

Chelsea and Zac are enjoying Denver and expecting their 2^nd boy in April.  Zac is doing great at his job and we expect he will make some great moves this next year as he seems to be very well liked and respected.  Chelsea of course has her hand in everything.  She became a Zumba instructor this past year as well as she is always baking and making the best stuff.  Gavin of course is a big ham and is lots of fun to have around.  He loves to talk and is going to be a great big brother.

Trevor had a pretty good soccer season even though his team struggled quite a bit.  He is currently playing basketball and working out in preparation for a great track season ahead.  He is doing well in school and just finished his Senior Presentation (a really huge thing they spend all semester preparing for.)  He is expecting to start his mission papers in March and receive a call by May – Oh my, what will I do another missionary will be leaving me before too long.

Spencer also played soccer this year and was an important part of the JV team.  He continues to improve his skills.  He is lying low this season as I try to convince him to finish a few merit badges and get his Eagle Project going.

Ken is doing well at work and keeping busy.  He was released as Young Men’s President and is now enjoying his favorite calling of Ward Financial Clerk.  And myself well, I stay very busy with subbing and working on my schooling.  I enjoy visiting my children and grandchildren and am looking forward to lots of great adventures over the course of 2012.

Well if you made it all the way through this – you deserve a gold Star!  Basically 2011 was a busy, wonderful, challenging and miraculous year.  We have been blessed in so many ways and know that our faith in Jesus Christ is what gets us through the ups and downs of life.